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Sunday, August 31, 2003 mmm don't know why but i've been listening to lighthouse family alot these days. you know how some albums just seem to encapsulate every single thing you feel, and the lyrics take the words right out of your mouth? yup. sets me in a mellow mood too, the lyrics just sing to you. and i've been playing my piano alot more frequently haha my sight reading doesn't seem to have deproved or whatever, though i've been taking a year long hiatus from practising. think after a's i'm gona go back to playing, gotta improve on my chords. you've been my salvation in a place where there's no love anymore char 8/31/2003 11:04:00 PM
Friday, August 29, 2003 save me my brother's keeping mealworms as pets!!! like double gross with a cherry on top he carries them around with him everywhere in a little stapler bullet box like what. the. hell man of all things to keep as pets! and today i was eating my spaghetti for dinner when my brother charges in with a very frantic look on his face shrieking that he can't find his slimy friends and then exclaims in joy when he finds them lying on the dining table i assure you you do not want to be in my position when this kinda thing happens. and then somehow my amorphous plate of spaghetti started to look like worms and i'm only glad i said grace before eating so yeah. feel like retching again anyways i like teachers days cuz my mommy brings back nice stuf from her students. like mrs fields cookies and chocolates so yep i get stuf to eat too hahah. ok back to mugging. char 8/29/2003 11:16:00 PM
Wednesday, August 27, 2003 today was so not my day. char 8/27/2003 09:10:00 PM
Tuesday, August 26, 2003 I have no solution To the sound of this pollution in me I'm not the one who broke you I'm not the one you should fear What do you got to move you darling I thought I lost you somewhere But you were never really ever there at all And I want to get free, talk to me I can feel you falling And I wanted to be all you need Somehow here is gone goo goo dolls char 8/26/2003 08:25:00 PM
Sunday, August 24, 2003 in. memory. watch the sunlight dance in circles on a trellis of vine a fleeting visage of forgotten dew helps to pass the time reaching dissolving falling from grace haunting me like an age-old refrain it's been so long now will i see you again? char 8/24/2003 08:38:00 PM
i was reminded the other day that my favourite colour is seven :) and it still is char 8/24/2003 08:32:00 PM
Wednesday, August 20, 2003 realised that i've got this bad habit of being a damn freaking big lightbulb. haha so i'm going to post a public apology right here. sorry to all the couples whose privacy i've at one point or another intruded upon. sorry to seow and joshua, for inviting myself to supper with yall at venezia, for sharing seow's car home, and various other times i'd rather forget. sorry to nat and alvin, for spoiling the long romantic walk to hwachong that fateful morning when we cramped into the teacher's car, just the three of us. yeeeech. sorry to del and ----. in advance. haha. if i've left out anyone - and i'm sure i have- buzz me or something i'll apologise personally. i'm going to start wearing a sign saying ignore me. no, really. no, don't look here i'm really not here. either that or i'll start investing in cab fares more frequently then i can enjoy my solitary taxi ride home. and there's always the sflc for company yay yay. char 8/20/2003 10:59:00 PM
Tuesday, August 19, 2003 i found my best friend again last sunday. and the greatest thing is that He was always there, and He never left once. not once. can't even begin to describe the peace in my heart, the peace that i've been missing out on for many months. and right now i'm truly happy :) because i've got His joy in me. Whom have I in Heaven but You There's none I desire beside You You have made me glad And I'll say of the Lord.... You are my shield My strength My portion Deliverer My shelter Strong tower My very present help in time of need char 8/19/2003 10:13:00 PM
would you believe me if i said that we are the ones who can make the change in the world today would you believe me if i said that all of your dreams in your heart can come true today would you believe me if i said that life could be all that you want it to be today and if i had wings i would fly 'cause all that i need, You are and if the world caved in around me to You i'd still hold on cause You're all that i believe and the one that created me Jesus, because of You i'm free would you believe me if i said that God can make miracles happen today would you believe me if i said that you don't need to wait for the answers before you step out in faith would you believe me if i said that nothing is ever impossible for God just live your life with God inside you wont regret one moment of it and give all that you can for God for God char 8/19/2003 10:03:00 PM
Saturday, August 16, 2003 went for the mg choir concert on fri, and i don't know but i don't really feel much of an attachment to the choir anymore? maybe cuz i don't recognise like half of them. they sound vapid and their voices are rather limp, and the fashion makeover didn't do wonders for some of them. i miss the blue gown. i miss my alto 2s. i miss habz seow sheryl hui'en and even huiling. i miss shu chloe and annalisa. and it's beyond me but i miss ruth's kiampah face. i miss ms tham. i miss ms yeow. i miss the stereoscopics or whatever hell that was. i miss all the comm meetings and the instant noodles and the choir board that we worked on until 7. i miss dissing christine. and desiree. and i miss my sanskrit pop song aka loo-k to this day and i miss the adrenaline rush accompanied by the foot-stomping during psalm 147. and omg i miss david and goliath!!! and all the moronic actions. i miss sf. i miss the chapel. i miss running up to the chapel to avoid being marked down by ms wan. but it's a different choir now. they've got a different blend of voices, different styles, different everything. so there i was sitting in the gallery near goh toh chai and the nj choir and it feels strange. like i'm being annexed from them and everything's beneath me literally. i'll remember how being in choir brought me some of the best experiences and company and friendships i've had so far, and i'm going to remember the mg choir like how it used to be. and at least i've got del nat and ange with me most of the time to share the memories with. haha nat was talking about that fresh sec 1/2 boy we saw at waffletown. ahhah stoopit girl are you sure you didn't spot him first, really i scare myself i've got these darned paedophilic tendencies. char 8/16/2003 11:24:00 PM
listen : listless the times i wish my God was a divine fortune teller. and that He'd make my decisions for me so i'll know that they'll lead to some place good and i'd be able to differentiate between the truths and the lies. and that He'd sieve out from my fistful of choices the good from the bad. and everything would be so easy. but just so you know, it doesn't work that way. choices. you didn't leave me with any decisions. i made all the wrong ones lies. feels good. char 8/16/2003 10:52:00 PM
Sunday, August 10, 2003 my blog is exactly one year old! :) heh i'll accept all presents on its behalf. char 8/10/2003 10:05:00 PM
Saturday, August 09, 2003 hahahahha this calls for an amplified wert midnight your true love will find you Something good will happen 2 you at 2:25 tomorrow. Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. Whoever breaks this chain letter will be cursed with 10 relationship problems for the next ten years. Tomorrow is National Kiss Day. If you send 15ppl this in 15 Min you're safe NO PASS BACK -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- it's midnight and the first person to 'find' me was char wishing me happy national day. hey char i guess you're my true love. although i was expecting someone with higher levels of testosterone, i can only gather from the above retard that i have lesbian tendencies. hubbahubbababy. i have strains of techno playing in my head now -they're not gonna get us- hahah so yeah del i guess they're not gonna get us not even m*rk. it's written in the stars. my gawd where do you get these chain letters from anyway!!! haha we all find love where we least expect it don't we. char 8/09/2003 10:56:00 PM
Friday, August 08, 2003 quote of the day: Charmaine is definitely capable of better results. She needs to improve her grasp of concepts in all subjects. yay managed to intercept my (questionable) progress report today. miss ong holds me in far too high esteem really heh but i guess i could be happy about chem? first time i didn't fail. yux. had my last national day celebration in school today, started off with a bang by mr ang who butchered the speech written for us in his typically painful english. then adjourned to the hall and was held enthralled by the mad and the chinese dance and the indian cultural society dancing to some bollywood backstreet boys soundtrack. then there were some fun dance performances and a song by ah zhan and the whole programme climaxed with the choir singing, and dancing. oh my lord haha i so do not know those people. and what intrigued me was that the prcs were singing with more gusto than the singaporeans. bizarre anyway i still remember my primary school days, when national day celebrations or any other celebration would be such a grand affair, and we'd all jump at the chance to wear red and white stuf. the other day yuying and i sang the 9th of august is a holiday i love that song heh, i'd have gladly gone back to hpps just to hear it again. now it's dwindled to some mass exodus of people leaving through the chinese high gate. and it's really excruciating listening to mr ang i'd much rather ms kon. and mr yeow wore a red shirt and white pants larh someone call the fashion police. anyway did my bit for homegrown productions by watching homerun today, it's a very sweet show :) the girl is really really sweet and it just killed me whenever she cried. jack neo's really working his magic though each show seems to be better than the next hah. char 8/08/2003 11:01:00 PM
When you were here before Couldn't look you in the eye You're just like an angel Your skin makes me cry You float like a feather In a beautiful world I wish I was special You're so fucking special But I'm a creep I'm a weirdo What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here I don't care if it hurts I want to have control I want a perfect body I want a perfect soul I want you to notice when I'm not around You're so fucking special I wish I was special But I'm a creep I'm a weirdo What the hell I'm doing here? I don't belong here She's running out again She's running out She runs runs runs Whatever makes you happy Whatever you want You're so fucking special I wish I was special But I'm a creep I'm a weirdo What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here I don't belong here radiohead char 8/08/2003 10:22:00 PM
Thursday, August 07, 2003 This is my life It's not what it was before All these feelings I've shared And these are my dreams That I'd never lived before Somebody shake me 'cause I I must be sleeping Now that we're here, it's so far away All the struggle we thought was in vain All the mistakes, one life contained They all finally start to go away Now that we're here, it's so far away And I feel like I can face the day I can forgive, and I'm not ashamed To be the person that I am today These are my words That I've never said before I think I'm doing okay And this is the smile That I've never shown before Somebody shake me 'cause I I must be sleeping I'm so afraid of waking Please don't shake me Afraid of waking Please don't shake me +staind+ char 8/07/2003 08:38:00 PM
Tuesday, August 05, 2003 just came back from mg my gawsh i miss that place to bits. haha though my initial inertia was much uncalled for larh damn glad i went back. and now i can really see why mg is so renowned for bad chinese it's not only bad it's very very bad!!! hahah shit larh i miss speaking terrible chinese and not getting shit for it. saw my laoshi and it hits you then that it's only in places like mg where you can converse in dual languages with your chinese teacher. this whole group of girls were offering my laoshi biscuits and they were like lao1 shi1 ni1 yao1 chi1 bing1 gan1 mah1 very earnestly and wo1 men2 pa4 hui1 you1 (how to say ants in chinese) to which my laoshi promptly replied ma3 yi3. haha omg broken chinese rocks. and wang de yuan's teaching there now the rest had a good time talking to him. a celebrity in mg! teaching chinese! haha weirded out. anyways he was from hc too, ange said he was telling them about holy when she was the discipline mistress and about some encounter he and his friend had with her. daaaaaaaMNNNN funny. anyway you know what they say: nothing that's worthwhile is ever easy. think that's my new mantra. for once maybe i'll be doing something worthwhile for myself it's just gonna take me a hell lot of grit and resolution but yeah for me i will. i'll grin and bear it. and in awhile all this will be o v e r . char 8/05/2003 06:00:00 PM
Saturday, August 02, 2003 they'll be going down to sentosa later. with their free qoo admission. i've realised that all 9-yr old boys talk the same way. when my dad started playing his cd of disney movie songs, one of them blasted into can you feel the love tonight. and the problem is he (thinks he) knows the chorus so he'll shout that extra loudly, and he told lincoln that if he were his friend he'd sing with him, to which my brother gladly obliged so yarh i've got a karaoke group belting out the chorus of can you feel the love tonight downstairs. one of them just asked my mum "auntie can you feel the love now??" and they're all so excited about sentosa they've got no appetite for all the party food my maid prepared for the past 1 hr. and they all insisted on saying grace before eating just now. think they're driving my dad wild though, he's having second thoughts on spending one glorious afternoon with a troop of monkeys at sentosa. and the neighbours are gonna call the police soon. haha i kinda realised smth: i watched my 1st brother go through his birthday parties, during this phase too, and it's quite heartwarming larh. haha for me. i don't know why but i just feel happy when i think bout it, just being able to watch my brothers grow up? to be able to capture their childish innocence and rambunctiousness, all bundles of life and joy. children make me happy :) yuppers char 8/02/2003 01:06:00 PM
it's my brother's mini birthday party today, my brother's friends are running around in my house now, they're so drop dead cute! they keep reciting the sar-vivor rap splitting the lines between them and they've been singing the qoo song. yknow the one played during the adverts? shall go record them. char 8/02/2003 12:06:00 PM
Friday, August 01, 2003 at salvation army doing cip again, my 3rd time here the supervisor knows me as the one who's good at packing. and zi says i know the place like i know my house trying to decide if that's a compliment or what. being slacker now heh. got bad cramps! :( feeling quite miserable haiyarh nvm shall wallow in self pity in the office by myself. think i rather like coming here to do cip, the people are all damn nice and there's so much stuf to buy! heh and didja know they sell wedding dresses here too? ooh and chinese high shorts someone must've been looking for a quick and easy way to ditch them. they sell weird ferragamo shoes too and a whole two racks of ah-go-go karaoke hostess garb haha halloween's coming..can dress up as a chinese high boy. frreeakkay. char 8/01/2003 06:59:00 PM
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